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by Mymy · 03.11.2025

It’s this situation that has more men than ever saying, “My wife turned lesbian,” and wondering why.

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But if your wife seems suddenly to have “turned lesbian” those feelings are often eclipsed by shear confusion.

It can be easy to focus on the complicated psychology and even biology that a woman experiences if her sexuality shifts. But a wife who has turned lesbian is only one half of the marital and life upheaval equation.

Understand this has nothing to do with your masculinity. If your wife has turned lesbian this is about her, not you.

I’ve counseled a number of married couples who’ve had to deal with one partner finding out the other is attracted to the same sex. Most often this is discovered through cheating, porn, or dating sites. The whole situation can feel out of the blue for many men – hence, the question, ‘How did my wife turn lesbian?’ Devastated partners struggle the most with understanding how their partner’s sexuality could be so different from what they’ve always believed. One told me a few weeks ago that ‘it makes no sense to me.’ And this confusion only intensifies the dishonesty and betrayal elements already affecting them.”